A New York divorce lawyer dies and arrives at the pearly gates. Saint Peter asks him, “What have you done to merit entrance into Heaven?”
The lawyer thinks a moment, then replies, “A week ago, I gave a quarter to a homeless person on the street.”
Saint Peter asks Gabriel to check this out in the record and, after a moment, Gabriel affirms that it is true.
Saint Peter says, “Well , that’s all well and good, but it’s hardly enough to get you into Heaven.”
The lawyer quickly responds, “Wait Wait! There’s more! Three years ago I also gave another homeless person a quarter.”
Saint Peter nods to Gabriel who, after a moment, nods back affirming this, too, has been verified.
Saint Peter then whispers to Gabriel, “Well, what do you suggest we do with this fellow?”
Gabriel gives the lawyer a sidelong glance, then whispers to Saint Peter, “Let’s give him back his 50 cents and tell him to go to Hell.”