As we approach Independence Day and prepare for our annual backyard barbecues and “safe” fireworks with the kids, many of us reminisce about the “good old days” when cherry bombs, bottle rockets and Roman candles were as much a part of the holiday as The Star Spangled Banner and Aunt Minnie’s Dutch apple pie. But most states outlawed them years ago to reduce injuries and fires. Replacing them are “snakes and sparklers” and assorted thingies that do little more than whistle and smoke.
Apparently, “real” fireworks are still available in Nevada (if they have whores, they’re bound to have serious fireworks, right?) but our Governor has begged Californians not to buy them this year. No wonder; we already have more than 1200 wildfires burning through our landscape, and firefighters have no idea when they’ll get them under control!
All of which reminded me of a classic scene in the movie Joe Dirt, a conversation between David Spade and Adam Beach…
Now, I’m not telling you what to do or not do, but I’m with Arnold on this, at least this year. How ‘bout forgetting the “real” fireworks? Go to a controlled fireworks show in your area instead. They’re bigger and better anyway, right?