The Physics of Cow Tipping
Click to enlargeThey still haven’t found a cure for the common cold, mind you, but I’m happy to report that scientists have been hard at work analyzing the dynamics of cow tipping — “a pastime allegedly common in rural areas, in which participants sneak up on an upright sleeping cow and then push it over for amusement” — and concluded it would require 4.43 able-bodied hayseeds to accomplish the task.
The physics seem sound. One objection that could be raised, however, is that the formula fails to take one critical factor into account: the total volume of alcohol consumed prior to the event. The groundbreaking study deserves kudos nonetheless. Read more…
Personally, I’m of the school of thought that believes cow tipping is pure urban legend. After all, I’ve never known anyone who has actually tipped a cow. Usually, they know a guy who knows a guy who has a friend whose crazy cousin Wilbur from Wisconsin used to go drinking with some guys who tried to break the local record for cows successfully tipped in one night, and probably would have if the cops hadn’t showed up and spoiled the attempt.
But I’m always open to being proven wrong, so if you’re a real live cow tipper and are willing to prove your unusual skill by tipping a few for me, let me know. I’ll bring the video camera and a case of beer. Maybe we can put this age old question to rest once and for all…
For more information and science on this exciting and controversial subject, check out Wikipedia where offered are evidence that cow tipping is an urban myth and, conversely, the possibility that cow tipping may be achievable.
Doug
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Reader Comments (9)
You are correct about the fabled practice of cow tipping. I spent a year working on a dairy farm where I participated in countless 3:30 AM milkings and observed over 300 sleeping cows a day. Cows sleep lying down, not standing up.
If a sleeping cow could be tipped over by some tanked-up frat rat, she could be tipped over by the wind. Mother Nature is not so easily outsmarted.
Cows weigh from less than a thousand pounds to around two thousand pounds, and they have a low center of gravity. Tipping a cow would be like toppling a low-built piece of concrete statuary. It would not be a tip-and-run situation. It would be a challenge, and old Bossy is not going to just stand there and cooperate.
Methinks whomever conducted the study made up the whole thing so their fellow frat-rats wouldn't know they were actually looking for sheep.
cow tipping is fun and it’s easy to find cows in texas. my sisters neighbors have cows…we tip them when we stay over… :D
I notice that the participants in this sport seem to have tipped something else before trying the cow. Alcohol seems to have impared their memories of the cow, maybe laying on the ground looking up at the cow makes the cow look like she's been tipped.
I think its vandalism of personal property and cruelty to animals and I guess i dont know how easy the cow can get back up.
Yes, its real I know a few guys who did it!
It seems the beer may have fogged my memory. Maybe it was one of those Wisconsin farm girls I tipped. :-)
I am a cattle farmer, and I hate bursting your bubble, but cow tipping is a myth perpetrated by city people with very little knowledge of cattle, and egged on by some rural people who think it is hilarious that city people would actually believe it.
First, cows sleep lying down, NOT standing up. Second, cows weigh anywhere from 800 to 1600 POUNDS, with a fairly low center of gravity, so even if you were to sneak up on one (very unlikely … cattle are a prey species) not only would you NEVER be able to get enough leverage to knock it over, it would trample you and your drunken buddies before you knew what was happening.
If you should happen to make the mistake of trying to tip a bull,(most of you probably can't tell the difference) be warned that it may take a while for the sheriff’s deputies to get the bull distracted from stomping and tossing your lifeless corpse all over the pasture.
You are right, I have known lots of people who swear they have tipped cows or know someone else who did. Obviously it is just an urban myth. And I beleived it all these years!