Our friend, Jamie, went to Apple Hill recently and “found this super cute bear wine bottle holder. I loved it and brought it home.”

                   Click to enlargeI don’t know how we missed it when Dawn and I spent Columbus Day exploring the Apple Hill area and taking photos. It’s a cute little bear; doesn’t match our decor, but they may have had something in, say, a modern-traditional motif.

Instead, we bought this “trained rabbit” wine butler named Jacques. He seemed pretty good when we first brought him home. He’d fetch red or white wines on command, even learned to differentiate between the French and American stock.

Our joy was short lived, though; we caught him taking a nip of a very fine Château Margaux. He promised it was a one-time thing and we gave him another chance. But then we found an empty (shudder) bottle of our Clos des Papes Châteauneuf-du-Pape 2003 that we’d been saving for our retirement party. And before we could even confront the little scoundrel, we discovered that all the ‘03 Cabernets were gone! It was clear something had to be done.

                    Click to enlargeWe scolded him, of course, even threatened to send him back where he came from. But it was in one long, furry ear and out the other. And then he broke into the liquor cabinet!

Well, that was the last straw! We called the store where we’d purchased the little lush and asked if we could return him. No way, they told us, not even if we paid them! Seems the little rodent had pulled the same shenanigans with them and they wanted nothing more to do with the booze-guzzling hareball.

So we’re placing an ad on Craig’s List tomorrow for one “Cute brown and white rabbit, free to good, non-drinking home.” If there’s someone you really dislike, Jacques might just be the perfect gift!