10 Questions for the Secret Service
You’ve all listened to and watched the news footage of the whacko angry Iraqi journalist who threw his shoes at President Bush during a press conference Sunday, and probably wondered why the Secret Service—the guys charged with protecting the President, even taking a bullet for him should the need arise—was conspicuously late to the party. Here are ten questions we’d all like to ask the Secret Service, compliments of Jon Friedman:
- Shouldn’t you have jumped in front of that shoe?
- Shouldn’t you have jumped in front of that second shoe?
- Second shoe = the one thrown after being removed from foot after first shoe was thrown…
- Let’s say people had three feet. Would you have allowed a third shoe to fly unimpeded?
- While the shoe was in the air, were you like, “Oh, its just a shoe.”
- Same question about the second shoe.
- Do you think this is funny: “Throw a shoe at me once, shame on—you. Throw a shoe—you throw a shoe, you can’t throw a shoe again.”
- Is there not “protection training” for lunatics launching objects?
- Let’s say there isn’t training for that—but do they tell you that if someone does throw (or shoot) something to be on the alert in case they want to repeat this behavior?
- Where were you?
If any of you hear from the Secret Service or think you know the answers to any of these burning questions, please share.
Doug
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Reader Comments (15)
Bwaaahaahaa! Good questions :) The SS came running out of the back room somewhere, probably interrupted their poker game or something. Not a good sign of their ability to protect the president.
An embarrassment of gigantic proportion. Want to wager they no longer have front line duty?
Those agents should be reassigned to protecting the ducks in Central Park :D
Geezus, these couldn't have been the "A" team. Those guys would have thrown themselves in front of the president and taken the shoe for him :) But the "A" team is probably assigned to Obama now.
Wow, if the secret service can't jump in front of a thrown shoe, there is no way they could jump in front of a bullet! Bush should feel really safe with them :)~
Bush would probably liked being wounded by a slightly off target bullet so he could play wounded hero as he leaves office.
All good questions. "Were you like 'Oh it's just a shoe'" lol! Probably. They were slow to respond because they had to scoop up their monopoly money so the other secret service guys wouldn't snatch it while they were out of the room. :)
#5: Yup, no sense getting their panties in a bunch for just a couple shoe. Besides, who thought you couldn't trust an Iraqi reporter who went through the metal detector?
OK, the guy was only 20 feet away. How is it that while he was taking off his shoes during a press conference (an odd and/or suspicious act unless you are at the beach, right?) and no secret service dud yelled "SHOE" into his little sleeve mike to bring all the other secret service dudes to crush the perp before he could get the first "round" off?
#4, If people had 10 feet, it would have made no difference. "Hold up, Johnson, don't leap in front of the pres, they's just shoes."
# 2 - Secret Service: "In hind site, our agent should have jumped in front of the second shoe (not jumping made us look bad). We are studying and analyzing how we can improve so we are better prepared for shoe hurlers in the future."
Pretty funny article lol :)
Here is #11: How did these guys ever qualify to be Secret Service agents? I mean, come on!! What an embarrassment!! Send them all back to their rent-a-cop jobs!!
Sad to say but Hookercrook is probably right. All the REAL Secret Service agents are assigned already to Obama.
#12 - If a shoe had hit Bush, would you have shot the thrower?
I know this is a joke, but the questions I think are on the minds of everyone whether they are laughing or worrying. What does the incident say about the alertness and readiness of our Secret Service?