I’m under the weather today. Truth be told, I feel like crap so I’m spending much of the day under the covers.

It’s not as much fun as it sounds. After spending most of Monday with my youngest grandson, Connor, I think I caught his cold. It’s really knocked me on my keister, so I’m derelict in my posting duties and may be tomorrow as well.

Should I get an unexpected burst of energy, I may throw something up, but don’t count on it.

Regular contributer Hugh Atkin from Down Under makes videos, some of which are comedic spoofs featuring the U.S. presidential candidates, and posts them on YouTube. Says Hugh in an email the other day:

“I’d taken a bit of a break from election videos, but if you’re interested, I’ve just posted a mock interview with Barack Obama based on the word association game he played on Fox News. I hope you like it.

Best regards,

Hugh Atkin”

In this spoof, Obama struggles with the concept of word association. I found it pretty funny. See what you think.

Here are a couple more of Hugh’s videos I particularly enjoyed: “What Voters Want Is…” and “Clinton and Cruise - On the Campaign Trail”

A woman walks into a downtown welfare office, trailed by 15 children.

“Wow,” the social worker exclaims.”Are they all yours?”

“Yep, they’s all mine,” the flustered momma sighs, having heard that question a thousand times before. “Sit down, Leroy!” she shouts toward her brood. All the children rush to find seats.

“Well,” says the social worker, “then you must be here to sign up. I’ll need all your children’s names.”

“This one, Leroy, he’s my oldest,” the woman replies.

“OK, and who’s next?” asks the social worker.

“Well, this one here is Leroy too,” answers the woman.

The social worker raises an eyebrow but continues. And one by one, through the oldest four, all boys, the woman gives their names as “Leroy”. Then she introduces the eldest girl as “Leighroy”.

“All right,” says the caseworker, “I’m seeing a pattern here. Are you telling me they all are named ‘Leroy’?”

The woman replies, “Well, yes, it makes it easier. When it’s time to get them out of bed and ready for school, I yells,’Leroy!’ an’ they all gets up. An’ when it’s time for dinner, I just yells ‘Leroy!’ an’ they all comes a runnin’. An’ if I needs to stop a kid who’s running into the street, I just yells ‘Leroy!’ and they all stop. It’s the smartest idea I ever had, namin’ them all ‘Leroy’.”

The social worker momentarily ponders the apparent logic, then wrinkles her forehead and asks tentatively, “But what if you just want just one of them to come and not the whole bunch?”

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All right, for those of you that asked to see Episode 2 when it was released (and those that didn’t ask but secretly wanted to), here ya’ go…

Watch Episode 1.

Here’s a scary thought. Imagine suffering a nightmare of horror, conspiracy and medical mystery, yet being called delusional or psychotic by your doctor and others. Imagine you might have Morgellons Disease.

People who suffer from Morgellons Disease describe feeling as though insects are crawling under their skin. They may have a number of other symptoms as well but, in most cases, they center on unexplained skin rashes and eczemas, and the appearance of fibers and granules coming out of their skin. Some say that they’ve seen insect-like parasites emerge from under their skin and fly away.

Sounds like a freakish ailment from a horror movie, doesn’t it? Some experts believe it’s a psychiatric phenomenon, yet hundreds of people swear it’s a real physical condition. And now the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) is paying California-based health care giant Kaiser Permanente $338,000 to interview and test patients suffering from Morgellons’ bizarre symptoms in a one-year study being conducted in northern California, the source of many of the reports of Morgellons (pronounced mor-GELL-uns).

I’m reminded of another once unknown condition: Lyme disease. Like Morgellons, Lyme disease affects sufferers with myriad symptoms, many of them similar to Morgellons. But unlike Morgellons, Lyme disease is now recognized and can be identified through medical diagnostics and lab tests. Let’s hope the Kaiser study leads to better understanding of Morgellons and relief for its sufferers.

For more information: Morgellons Research Foundation; Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

It’s been a while since I posted a gallery of critter images. Barbara sent this collection, some cute, some artistic and some downright funny. Enjoy!

Got a dead body? Just call Frank’s Crime Scene Steam-N-Clean — the premiere biohazard removal company! Here’s the just released (well, July 21) first episode of this original webisode series:

The first episode of a dark comedy series created and produced by USC graduate film students Scott Rickels, Tim Dragga and Tim Kolesk stars Dale Midkiff, Richard Riehle, Matt Bettinelli-Olpin, Tyler Tuione, Chrissy Anderson, Travis Willingham and Jessica McClendon. More episodes are “in the works” (as those of us “in the biz” like to say). Link

It’s the story of a low-rent super-villain, the hero who keeps beating him up, and the cute girl from the laundromat he’s too shy to talk to.

Neil Patrick Harris…..as Dr. Horrible
Nathan Fillion……….as Captain Hammer
Felicia Day…………..as Penny

And a cast of dozens!

Joss Whedon began writing his musical web series (watch the teaser below), with the help of all his relatives and friends, during the writer’s strike, then streamed the first three acts, free, on the official web site (not to be confused with the official fan site). The “free streaming broadcast” part is no more, but they are available on iTunes and, in the not-too-distant future (before Christmas) the complete short epic will be available on DVD. It’ll be legen….wait for it….dary!

P.S. At great personal risk, I was able to obtain this copy of “The Master Plan”, secretly penned by Joss Whedon in a dark, scary secret cave somewhere (but not the Bat Cave. This one’s shown at the beginning of the teaser, I think) that will explain the whole twisted, diabolical scheme. Read it! Be safe!

Yesterday’s post was intended to be sort of tongue-in-cheek; I just wanted an excuse to use the old Cagle ‘toon and see if anyone was still concerned about mad cow. Guess many still are. So I was glad to get this from Roboseyo in Seoul, Korea, where the natives are pretty restless about mad cow. I found it humorous and worth sharing. Says Rob:

“I have good news for all my Korean friends, and even concerned citizens in America.

See, after I got home from a lovely date with girlfriendoseyo, and a delightful walk through all the friendly protesters offering me red signs, and walking like docile cattle through the winding streets around Gwanghwamun, I checked my e-mail.

I got an e-mail from an actual, real scientist… I forget his name because I was so excited that I deleted the e-mail without thinking after I read it, but he went to Harbard or something, I swear, and here’s, like, totally the best news I’ve ever heard, and it’s absolutely totally true, because a real, actual scientist from Harbard told me.

He says that I don’t have to worry about mad cow disease, because kimchi makes you immune to it! He said kimchi’s special combination of garlic, han, spicy chili, and jung kills the prions that cause mad cow, and he showed me some serious, like really actually real science that totally proves it’s true. Here it is: See!

That totally proves it! If you don’t want to catch mad cow disease from American beef, all you have to do is eat it with kimchi, and the kimchi will kill the prions! […]

So just make sure you eat your beef with kimchi, and you’ll be fine! I swear! It’s science! Science is true!

P.S. New definition of Irony: Mad cow beef protester taking a break from shouting slogans for a nice, relaxing cigarette.”

Remember mad cow disease? Did our boycott of foreign beef wipe it out in the U.S.? Is it really safe to go back in the water?

Apparently not, at least according to this web site…

Get in tune with your brain waves

Insomniacs who listened to classical piano created in response to their own brain waves — a technique called brain music therapy — improved their sleep quality in four weeks according to a University of Toronto study. The cutting edge therapy boosts levels of melatonin, a brain chemical linked to sleep.

Snake oil you say? Science, says Dr. Galina Mindlin, MD, PhD, an Assistant Clinical Professor of Psychiatry in Columbia University, College of Physicians and Surgeons, and the Supervising Attending Physician in the Department of Psychiatry in St. Luke’s Roosevelt Hospital Center. She has a PhD in neurophysiology and neuropsychology.

According to the Brain Music Treatment web site, brain music therapy is an effective, scientifically proven treatment for stress, insomnia, anxiety, and depression. It has also been found to increase productivity and concentration. Doctors record an individual’s brain waves and convert them into unique musical sounds. These musical sounds correlate to brain waves that promote relaxation and trigger activation in your body. The musical sounds are presented to you in the form of two musical files - one relaxing, and one activating. Playing the files promotes relaxation and activation in your body. The therapy is backed by solid scientific evidence, including double blind studies.

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No presidential election would be complete without a contribution from JibJab to make light of it. Here’s their latest…

Article removed by editor.

Apple Inc. said Monday that it sold 1 million of its new 3G iPhones over the weekend amid high demand for the device that was greeted with long lines and long activation times around the world. In a statement, Apple Chief Executive Steve Jobs said the new iPhone was “clearly off to a great start,” as it took Apple 74 days to sell 1 million of the first version of the iPhone. …

Gene Munster of Piper Jaffray said Apple’s iPhone sales exceeded his estimates of 425,000 units for the weekend, and that global demand is better than expected. “This trend will likely continue,” Munster said, as Apple plans to roll out the iPhone in 70 countries over the next few months. Munster estimates Apple will sell 4.1 million iPhones in the current quarter, and sales could reach 45 million units in 2009. Full story

As for Apple’s new online AppStore during the same weekend, users downloaded more than 10 million applications! AppStore has more than 800 native applications for iPhone and iPod touch. Of that number, more than 200 are offered for free and more than 90% are priced at less than $10.

I’m sometimes astounded by the inventive means some folks devise to rip people off. If only they were able to channel their creative energies toward something more, well, legal.

Take the case of this former Folsom Auto Mall employee. He noticed that his employer used purchase orders to charge gasoline at neighboring stations, noted where managers kept the purchase order book, determined who was authorized to sign the orders and learned to forge their signatures. Then he stole about 100 purchase orders and used them to steal $14,000 worth of gasoline over a three month period.

A dealership employee noticed him orchestrating the fill up of a line of cars and alerted authorities. He was arrested Sunday night… Story